There is a lot written about parenting and divorce, but almost all of it has to do with minor children. Divorce has important implications for young children and teens and requires careful negotiation, discussions, and legal insight to create a parenting plan that is in their best interests. What no one talks about is the adult children who are living at home and how a divorce affects them. According to the Pew Research Center, 36% of Millennials (ages 18 to 36) live at home with their parents. The reasons for this often have to do with the job market, the cost of college, and the financial climate.
When you divorce and have adult kids in your home, you don’t need to negotiate custody and visitation, but you will probably want to talk with them about where they are going to live. If one of you is remaining in the marital home, having an adult child remain in place can make the transition easier for the spouse who will continue to live there. If your child does not pay rent or help with expenses, it may be time to change that, as some additional funds may be needed to continue to pay the mortgage or buy groceries. If your child will be moving out, this adds another layer of change, financial need, and stress to the situation.
Even though your child is an adult, the divorce does have an impact on him or her. It is tempting to speak more freely about the divorce to an adult child, but you should remember that he or she doesn’t want to take sides and doesn’t want to be put in the middle. Adult kids may feel they need to intervene in some way and try to fix or help the situation. As nice as it might be to have your child want to help, it’s generally a bad idea. Try to keep your relationship with your child separate from the divorce and keep his or her involvement to a minimum.
Call DeTorres & DeGeorge for assistance with your divorce or family law case in Bloomsbury, New Jersey and the surrounding areas. Reach us at 908-284-6005 for an appointment.